Several years ago I had an "aha moment" in a presidency meeting. My friend, and counselor, Christi was in charge of the spiritual thought to start us off. She told a story about her son. Jake had just started middle school - HUGE adjustment. He was having a particularly hard time in math. His father had been working with him for several nights in a row on a new concept that had just been introduced but he just wasn't getting it very well.
Christi could see after several days of this that he was growing more and more discouraged. Being the wise mom that she is, she saw this as a teaching opportunity. She sat down with him and said, "Jake, whether or not you can solve this particular kind of math problem doesn't really matter in the scheme of things. You came here to this earth with your worth, you don't have to earn it." Immediately, she could see that he felt better and Jake knew that everything was going to be ok.
What a powerful message! I need to be reminded of that. ALOT. I also have tried to communicate that to my kids as much as I possibly can. We live in a world that tells us that we have to earn our value. We need to be a size 6, a good provider, mother, hostess, wife, . We should be the best at everything we do so that we can impress others, receive loads of praise, and feel valued. That is the world's way.
Heavenly Father would have us know that we came here with our worth. We should strive to do our best, yes. But his grace is sufficient to make up where we lack. HE loves us unconditionally - just for trying.
I used to be such a perfectionist. I spent hours cleaning, cooking, helping children with homework (so they could be high achievers too), working in my calling, serving others. There were times I got so worn out that I had nothing left to offer. Then one day I realized it was not the best environment to live in. It wasn't what I wanted for my kids. It wasn't very peaceful. When you are a TRUE perfectionist, you never feel content.
With a lot of prayer and conscientious effort, I can happily say that I no longer feel like I have to do everything perfect. I probably have only a few things I do WELL. But I am a much happier person, knowing that I don't have to earn my worth. I came here with it. Perfectionism is overrated. Trust me, peace feels much better.